Monday, 22 March 2010

Cherry popping

My first time is a blur.

I was nervous and cautious, I think I saw a tear or two in her eye. The old nurse was barking instructions at me, how to get this over there, how I should grip that, and very specifically what goes where.

Have you not practiced at home?’ she despaired.

I had, but obviously not enough. Some things you just expect to be good at.

With everything in the right hole I started to move. Slow and steady. Forwards, slight movements to the left, careful gestures to the right. Every now and again I would slow further, even stop for a moment, just the sound of heavy breathing carrying the moment until I would hold mine and start to move once again.

Every bump was magnified, wince inducing. Every screech I heard made me flinch. Half of the people seemed to be watching and passing judgment. ‘That poor girl’.

The other half apparently indifferent, selfishly unaware of the importance of these moments, the rite of passage that was taking place.

I was in constant fear of going too fast, perhaps overestimating my prowess and any discomfort it could cause, all the while equally worried about being far too timid and having no one reach their desired destination.

Eventually, maybe even inevitably, we made it. All of us in one piece, still on speaking terms, just as besotted as before. That nervous first time has been repeated a couple of times now. It’s gotten easier.

There may well be more first times, other girls, but there will only ever have been one real first time.

Driving Miss Mango.

27 comments:

Veronica said...

Oh yes, I remember this so well. Driving Amy home from hospital, once we'd finally gotten home Nathan turned and looked at me and said 'Wow, it's a whole different ballgame driving with a newborn in the car.'

And it was.

Ms. Moon said...

I was scared to death to drive my grandson the first time and I have spent my LIFE driving babies and children around.
It still makes me nervous.

Chrissy said...

U nervous? Isn't this the second or third one for you? Aww, thought u'd be more at ease... I know we were...We weren't as careful to keep every little noise away like we did w/the other who ended up being sensitive and a light sleeper...

Russ said...

When we were taking Mr. B home from the hospital for the first time, we were terrified. Whose bright idea was it to let us have this child. Don't they know that we don't have any experience with this sort of thing!

Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] said...

The drive home from the hospital w/ Anna made me realize every other person on the road is a maniac.

Kori said...

I guess this wouldn't be a good time to bring up the time I left Owen in his carseat on the sidewalk?

Steve said...

Very good. I thought you were on the first nappy change for a while there.

I didn't mind the driving, once I'd spent 20 minutes convincing myself I'd got the car seat fixed right.

Ed said...

Good God, man!! What about the hazards? Surely you didn't forget to put on the hazards!!!

Putz said...

DRIVING MISS DAISY. oh wait a minute that was a movie i sawr, i slammed by new born's finger in the car door and smashed it flat, damaged goods??????, no the finger came right back pink and everything>>>>RELAX

wildhare said...

Be sure to signal your turns both with the blinker and your arm out the window!

Susanica said...

Too funny! Driving Miss Mango. What will you think of next? Also loved the one about passing the baby baton just to eat. Couldn't comment on my blackberry for some reason but did spend time snickering out loud during a very dull meeting. -M

tomi said...

We were terrified as well when we drove home for the first time - not a peep from Momo except when DH took a sharp turn.

corymbia said...

I remember sitting in the back seat next to my first child when we had to drive her home from hospital - I *had* to make sure she was OK for teh 20 minutes journey.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

@Veronica - Certainly was!

@Ms. Moon - Weirdest thing ever really.

@Chrissy - Er, I think you've missed the point of the post, and perhaps the entire blog.

@Russ - yes, very much a matter of 'dont we need approval to take this thing away from here?'

@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] - Did you go through a taco bell drive through?

@Kori - er...you what?

@Steve - I'm not convinced that even with the seat in right it would offer any protection should it be needed, but I'm not even going to think about that.

@Ed - haha, there were some very clear signals being made!

@Putz - you did not! I'd die.

@wildhare - and the electronic arm connected to the back of the car!

@Susanica - I'm here to serve bored executives!

@tomi - hehehe I know the feeling

@corymbia - Our drive was maybe 5 mins max!

Jo said...

Oh god, the first drive. Leaving the house by myself for the first time.. I remember it well!

areyoukiddingme said...

I believe the moment when my husband drove us home from the hospital was the moment he started driving like a myopic grandmother.

Now, my little girl says "Drive faster, Mommy!" Like I need encouragement of something.

areyoukiddingme said...

Sorry "or something"

Lorna said...

Brillinat post as always :-)

Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo said...

I don't remember the first time driving with Moo. I am pretty sure I was screaming at MPS to slow the f*ck down already. Cause like *I* was going to drive... I had GIVEN LIFE for crying out loud.

shane said...

is every1 retarded? this isnt about first time driving :L its a lil more durty than that :L hAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.........ha

River said...

I don't drive so didn't have that problem with my firstborn. Hubby did the driving and I didn't notice any difference at all in speed or care taken. With my second, we came home in a taxi, because hubby had gotten drunk and forgot to come and get us.

livingrightnow said...

lol. Driving Miss Mango.

I remember ours, we argued about getting her into the carseat, then I sat with her all the way home, constantly checking her. I was just a bit cautious.

-Tanya

James (SeattleDad) said...

I drove 30 in a 50 zone and yelled at everyone who passed me. Literally. I was pathetic.

Gail said...

Er am I the only one in Blogdom who thought you were talking about taking her out in a buggy?

Oh well.......

Xbox4NappyRash said...

@Jo - Oh, not done a solo drive yet...ooh

@areyoukiddingme - hahaha

@Lorna - heh, thanks.

@Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo - Typical, lazy.

@shane - Subtle...

@River - Sounds like you have a few stories yourself!

@livingrightnow - just a bit!

@James (SeattleDad) - hahahaha

@Gail - Yes, I think so... wally.

hotmamamia said...

Heehee...wait til you put her in one of those backback baby carrier thingies....or a bicycle seat for the tot....kodak moments, I tell you!

Xbox4NappyRash said...

@hotmamamia - We'll see!