Thursday 5 November 2009

25

The wife squatter turned twenty five weeks old yesterday.

By all accounts, it now weighs just short of 2lbs, or just under a kilo for those of you who are, well, Dutch.

All the wee bugger’s organs are present and correct. I now have a fully qualified donor match! It’s kind of like having your own vegetable patch.

I do jest of course, something I seemingly must explicitly express for those among us who’ve had transplants of their own of a humourous variety.

Anyway, all the baby’s bits and pieces are in place, its skin doesn’t look like greaseproof paper anymore, and it even has wee tooth buds forming in its gums. Hopefully it’s listening to me whispering at it in the dead of night to come out biting when it does arrive.

All junior needs to do now, is grow. Sit back on its mother’s bladder with its feet up on her spleen, gorge itself on amniotic fluid, and just grow. Grow, grow, and grow some more.

You have the hard part done kiddo, now you just got to do what comes naturally to those unfortunate genes of yours, get chubby.

After 25 weeks, take off the boil, and simmer for 15 more.


34 comments:

Liz said...

You say it is a joke but it must feel good to have a back up liver.

Anonymous said...

Happy 25!!!!

Putz said...

yep you have done the hard part nappy, is that what you were trying to tell me in the post blog ....now that the horredous task of all that intercurse, the hard part is done....now sit back and take it easy and let the 25 year old do what????the rest of the work?????what????you are done?????what?????

Ms. Moon said...

Ah good one! Great analogy with the simmering. Breathe a sigh of relief, enjoy the rest of the ride. Your turn is coming. Babies, babies, babies. Yay for babies!

James (SeattleDad) said...

Yep only 15 weeks until your social life retires. You should plan a party.

AnnB said...

Enjoy the rest of the ride -but talk nice to him/ her- 'cos if you ever need that transplant..... and you haven't talked nice.......

Susanica said...

Hi X-Box. Oh yeah. Isn't it great when they are about as done as they are gonna be and now they just get to grow and grow? Why is this such a bad thing at our ages I wonder. Of course we totally encourage kids to burp and stuff and look what happens when we try to do that in public? Sounds like things are going "swimmingly" for Lil Fitz. Yeah!!!!! -Monica

Dan said...

Getting there now!

Exciting stuff.

Tara R. said...

Better than half way!

Ed said...

So in about 6 years and 15 weeks those tooth buds will be replaced with crisp bills from the tooth fairy.

Too soon? Have I skipped important stuff that might happen in between?

Shanny said...

Glad the boiling is done with... enjoy the simmering phase!

Anonymous said...

Just flying by and you are enjoying it with your usual aplomb!

Veronica said...

25 weeks! YAY!

Always good to have spare kidneys laying about though.

tiff(threeringcircus) said...

A definite milestone. Simmer away little one, simmer away.

River said...

OMG! Only 15 weeks left! I can feel the excitement building.

mammydiaries said...

Good Morning from miserable, wet, old Ireland where I am attempting to recover from "mam" flu (even deadlier then man flu!) but a certain 5 month old has different ideas about what recovery means... Just wait, in 15 weeks, the real fun begins! Congrats on the 25 week mark :)

Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo said...

OMG YOU ARE SO AWESOME!

Happy now?

heh heh heh

{and yes, dear BoxBoy readers, I am a little tiny bit crazy}

Jennikybooky said...

The wife squatter - oh how I laughed! Reminds me of the classic Irish chat up line "How's your belly for a lodger?" Shur it never fails!

Martin said...

@womb for improvement - who was joking?

@Christa - yee haw!

@Putz - Behave yourself!

@Ms. Moon - calm down... breathe...

@James (SeattleDad) - It's hardly hitting great heights at the moment though!

@AnnB - I'll keep that in mind ;-)

@Susanica - Yep yep yep!

@Dan - it's creeping in alright

@Tara R. - 5 8ths!

@Ed - I think you may have jumped an episode or two yes...

@Shanny - will do!

@hotmamamia - flying by?

@Veronica - I have the appendix from a street tramp under the stairs.

@tiff(threeringcircus) - I burn stuff...

@River - the numbers are getting smaller, freaky

@mammydiaries - Morning! "beterschap" as they say here.

@Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo - 'teh'awesome you mean?

@Jennikybooky - never worked for me! (welcome!)

Anonymous said...

As long as he/she doesnt grow too much. Ouch!

Anonymous said...

yeah! This is awesome! Amazing that it has been 25 weeks already.

Angie said...

The visuals you create are slightly disturbing, yet I can't help but picture a mini you clawing your way out of her belly.

Danielle said...

So wonderful, you are almost there!

Not Afraid to Use It said...

Wife squatter. Can't stop laughing! Now that is certainly one way to look at it!

areyoukiddingme said...

I'm pretty sure that even though the simmering one has half of your genes, he/she does not necessarily have the compatibility to donate organs. I suggest that you continue to protect your own internal organs...

Mick said...

The wee tooth buds always shocked me.

Speaking of which, my cousin was born with teeth!

Then again I think she was really a witch...

Blues said...

It's more like a microwave.

"Beep...beep....beep".

Kid's done.

WeaselMomma said...

That's wonderful! I am glad that all is going so well. Grow little bugger/bugette grow, but keep your toes out of your mother's ribcage. No matter how fun it is to swing like a monkey. You can crack a rib that way and that's no fun for Mom (and she'll get payback someday).

Irrational Dad said...

Now it's time for the little one to start growing like a weed!

Chris Mancini said...

It's the only time you're supposed to actually sit back,relax, and gain wait. Then society ruins everything.

naughty said...

Still reading, love your posts and very happy for you both. Grow baby grow!

Anonymous said...

As my Pentecostal kin used to say, "It's all over but the shoutin'!" Hang in there . . .

Hockeyman said...

I think if you ever want to have some hippity dippity fun, it would be better if the buggar doesn't come out biting.

Martin said...

@Tismee2 - and she's only 5 foot....

@mybumpyjourney - Time flies eh?

@Angie - such is life

@Danielle - well, not almost, but edging close

@Not Afraid to Use It - it's exactly what it is!

@JanuskieZ - No. Piss off.

@areyoukiddingme - You mean no brandy for breakfast...

@Mick - THAT is freaky...

@Blues - longest time any dish has been in one if thats the case...

@WeaselMomma - Ouch.

@Joe @ IrrationalDad - exactly!

@Chris Mancini - It's ruined more than that!

@naughty - Thanks :-)

@thecheekofgod - and boy do I predict some shoutin'

@Hockeyman - you may have a point