Friday, 19 December 2008

Pathetic or sympathetic?

We've all heard of funny stories about men having sympathetic pregnancies.
This is of course, where they display similar symptoms as their partners.

Well, I don’t know why I should be surprised, but I believe I've taken this sympathetic symptom thing to a whole new extreme.

I believe I am suffering from a sympathetic ovulation.

My temperature has soared and I have mucous free flowing out of me.

Granted, my temperature is somewhere around eyebrow singeing temperature and the mucous is coming from my upper body and not my lower. (Although, that is hardly surprising seeing as I don't actually have a willy warmer to ooze from.)

So while the maggoty OPKs refuse to co-operate, (possibly a faulty batch,) it seems that ET is ovulating and I've joined in for the hell of it.

There is another possibility, so dark, desperate, and chilling to imagine, I am afraid to speak it's name.

Man cold.

Has our world ever heard tell of seed of man taking root and flourishing during a period of such great evil?


42 comments:

Ed (zoesdad) said...

This is disturbing indeed!

Godspeed, my good man.

Edith said...

Oh oh....
Did I curse you? LOL

You know what, it CAN be a good thing. I often hear athletes saying that they performed better because of a little cold/higher temp....

Okay sure, there is no such thing as a little cold... sorry...
I'm sure you won't suffer in peace

;)

B said...

...a willy warmer.




I thought the Dutch were all superhealthy and such?

Ms. Moon said...

They aren't (cough, cough) Dutch. Or so I've been informed.
Take your cold to bed. Bring your woman with you. See what happens.

Joe said...

On the bright side, it's not yet Hep-B!

Joe said...

Oh, and you have my vote for "Pathetic". Man Cold always is.

And yes, you're welcome.

Russ said...

Women just don't understand how much worse colds are for men than they are for women!

Excuse me while I go and hide from the incoming hail of shoes!

(Willy warmer! Ha! I gotta remember that one.)

WhatAboutNovember said...

Not the dreaded Man Cold! Poor ET. Pass on my condolences to her. As for you, snuggle up under a blanket with some hot tea and some tissues. You'll pull through. ;)

Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] said...

You're such a woosy pants.

M+B said...

Pathetic! You men and your Man Colds *sheesh*

Sympathetic to poor ET having to deal with you in the throws of your Man Cold!

Sniffle&Cry said...

Man Cold Xbox !

Jesus Christ man, get in the medics. ET doesn’t understand, she can’t. Don’t hate her for it. She’ll empathise by talking about “girl pain”, and
“ getting on with it”. Grin an bear this as best you can, women have no concept or grasp on pain. Take powerful drugs, take loads of them, and whiskey too. Take care - short passes only kid - nothing extravagant for a while.

Christa said...

Shit. Go away Man Cold!! Hopefully that temp doesn't get to high. I think it's the fever that's the bad part...

Good Luck!!

NukeDad said...

We went through something kind of similar, but AFTER the kids were born. I'd get just as tired as she did and nap almost as often. I tried to help out to alleviate my guilt, but my breast feeding abilities weren't up to par. Or so I thought. Ends up the kids were all man-tose intolerant.

iVegasFamily said...

"Willy warmer." That's good. I think I'll use that.

nh said...

Very worrying, a serious case of Man-Cold! Take care, wrap up warm and enjoy hot toddies! You'll soon be ok (or as ok as you normally are!)

Kori said...

Nope, just think of it as a little extra lubrication and enjoy.

womb for improvement said...

Well, let's hope it doesn't develop into Man Flu. I don't think i could stomach the wingeing.

For the vote. Pathetic.

bsouth said...

Honestly Xbox, you're such a big girls blouse.

I thought it was called Man Flu, not Man Cold, because men act like they've got the flu when actually they have a mild cold.

Tismee2 said...

XBox - I'm thinking if it's man 'cold' then you've sneezed twice in the same day.

ET - go out and shop, leave him to wallow in his own misery - no reason for you to suffer his whining too.

Nick McGivney said...

I believe ceebeebies is the cure for all things mancold. Can you get ceebeebies where you are?

jbondsgirl said...

Man cold...shiver. There are no greater words of dread known to a woman than the words "man cold". Unless of course they are "man flu".

Poor ET.

Veronica said...

Oh god NO!

Putz said...

ya i have had the flu that bad before also

Mo and Will said...

XBox, you are hilarious!

Thank you for making me laugh (a difficult thing to do these days, I assure you!)

Mo

Tara R. said...

This is so funny. I was showing a friend of mine a vid from YouTube about the Man Cold. My sympathies to ET... hope you are feeling better soon.

jothemama said...

Aw, Poor Xbox.

I hear Boots are doing ManCold Packs, with tissues and vitamins... and a bell...

do check out mancold on youtube, there's a hilarious sketch there.

James Austin said...

Man Cold huh? We are such whimps, aren't we? Hope you are feeling better soon.

Penelope said...

Is there anything on Earth more sad than a man cold? Really?
Get well soon ;o)

Kelley said...

It is common knowledge that man cold is caused by testosterone.

Testosterone makes cold infinitely worse for men and also causes the malaise of 'man looking' when males of the species stand in a room and if the item they are looking for does not jump up and hit them in the balls they deem it 'lost' or 'gone'

tiff said...

Feel better soon boxy

Jill said...

Oh my... you definitely don't sound healthy. Get well soon... you have some business to attend to!

Jo Beaufoix said...

Maybe all that mucous will help?? Persoannly I feel kind of sorry for ET. I certainly wouldn't want to bonk you in this state.

AnnD said...

The humping must go on! Unless you are bleeding profusely or have explosive diarrhea...the humping must go on!

K8 the Gr8 said...

Ovulation sympathy eh? Does that mean you start fancying butch girls all of a sudden? I only get Bruce Willis cravings at certain times of the month I find... followed by predictable boob swelling. If you get that, THEN you worry.

Jenni said...

the dreaded man cold! i recommend lots of bad television and tissues. feel better!

Karen MEG said...

Man cold, poor you!!!

Mucousy in all the wrong places, eh? (I know, that was sorta gross, but I couldn't resist).

Get some rest, young man, you've got a job to do!

Get better soon, 'kay?

Sarah said...

Hmmm, I could have sworn I posted a comment.....But I see that I apparently did not. Weird, maybe I just thought about it and never got around to actually doing it.

Anyway...

Feel better friend.

UrbanVox said...

the Rut of all evil!!
but a willy warmer???
lol

hotmamamia said...

Oh no, we don't want the man cold to overwarm the juice...that would not be a good thing...best get yourself some good chicken soup and fight off that bug before you share it with ET and then you both will be down for the count!

Quickroute said...

a hot toddy and you'll be sorted

River said...

According to my Mum, Dad had sympathy labour. I was born at home as Mum went into labour while Dad was at work, by the time he got home all he could do was call the doctor. As soon as I was born, Dad started having all the pains Mum had just been through. The doctor couldn't do anything for him.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

@Ed (zoesdad) - I did my best sir.

@Edith - I'm off to my doctor to DEMAND antibiotics ;0)

@B - Oh they are, just not on the train to my particular destination. Hell hole.

@Ms. Moon - Oh Mrs Moon, I think he was referring to my fellow passengers, who are for themost part, Dutch.

@Joe - Such a gent.

@Russ - They just don't understand Russ, they just don't.

@WhatAboutNovember - Hopefully we will be okay.

@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] - you? again? really?

@M+B - that's not very sympathetic....

@Sniffle&Cry - 'short passes only kid' I've just had flashbacks from that phrase. Cold, wet weekend mornings training.

@Christa - There were a few hallucinagenic moments...

@NukeDad - Damn useless man nipples...

@iVegasFamily - feel free!(free willy warmer...)

@nh - how ok I normally am isn'rt a great advertisement is it?

@Kori - I'm torn between calling that kinky and creepy.

@womb for improvement - You hubby is a feckin saint.

@bsouth - I've been IN a few...

@Tismee2 - There are countries where you would have yuor tongue cut out for promoting such spousal uprising.

@Nick McGivney - We actually do! I think.

@jbondsgirl - Shhh, dont say those words.

@Veronica - Yes!

@Putz - We are like long lost brothers Putz...

@Mo and Will - a laugh is a small, but vital consolation these days, I know. Take care.

@Tara R. - Sympathies to WHO now!

@jothemama - No boots here! I've seen that sketch, very very good.

@James Austin - I'm atrooper James, I will carry on.

@Penelope - There is the whole famine in Africa thing, but barely!

@Kelley - you mean, I have testosterone! Par-Tay!

@tiff - Will do!

@Jill - a missing lung wont stop me!

@Jo Beaufoix - it adds a little 'danger' to the situation!

@AnnD - My thoughts exactly!

@K8 the Gr8 - My boobs swelled a long time ago....

@Jenni - No one ever offerd me 'bad'tv and tissues before... you might be the best mother EVER!

@Karen MEG - wrong place eh? depends on how resourceful you are ;0)

@Sarah - Basically it shows that all these posts are the same...

@UrbanVox - well, it IS warm in there isn't it?

@hotmamamia - care was taken!

@Quickroute - Literally, I'd puke at the thought of one

@River - That is classic, great story.