Saturday 9th & Sunday 10th June, 2007.
So far so good. This should be a piece of piss. Little Mama is now contraception free and it's just a matter of getting down to business.
3 times in the two days in fact, 4 if you count the one time that would surely end up in medical journals should it result in pregnancy.
Also, I must say about the whole thing, it's quite enjoyable.
Monday 11th & Tuesday 12th June, 2007.
One thing I have learned about this process is this.... I know absolutely nothing about this process.
If you break it down to the simple 'where, when, how and who', I just about can cover the 'where' and 'who', with a passing grade on the 'how'. The 'when', apparently, is a lot more important that I had anticipated.
Having consulted the mother parent of all parents, aka the internet, we have established some basic points.
To be successful in this month we need to go to the chemist and buy a miracle. As thats what it would most likely take. Unfortunately here in Holland the chemists are never open when you need them and besides, miracles are illegal here.
Having stopped with contraceptives, Little Mama's body is sorting itself out into a natural cycle so we face disappointment at any point between now and Thursday week, the 21st.
If that happens we have to call month 1 a failure and wait a few days for month 2, when, in reality the serious stuff should begin.
But ! I'm not giving up on this month just yet, my gut feeling got me into this and it's the same gut feeling that's telling me we could still pull this off first time out.
And so the daily transactions shall continue until success, failure or I until start fainting in public.
The blubbiness continues, in fact it's multiplying. I'm now day dreaming scenarios full of cute gurgling babies, cheeky toddlers, well grounded and respectful teenagers and adult children refusing to put me into a home and not just because it would eat into their inheritance.
I'm imagining the rejoicing throughout western Europe when we break the news, and I'm envisioning the tears of joy that will flow when the birth is announced.
I'm thinking of names and listening to far too much Emmylou Harris.
Did I mention that I am an idiot ?