Wednesday 28 November 2007


Am I losing the run of myself with this whole 'child' thing?

This afternoon we discovered that this month, yet again, it's not to be.

I'm not a religious person by any means, but over the past months I've found myself clinging to the notion that "someone somewhere" is deciding when the right time would be.

I play this off against my rational side, saying that we have to prepare physically before we'll succeed. Which we have done.

Now, I find myself face to face with the fact that neither channel for my thinking has brought about our desired result, and now, I just don't know which way to turn. I'm lost.

People say that any fool can become a parent, and that it's being a good one that's difficult. I'm under no illusions as to how hard and taxing it would be.
I am literally, ready, willing and able, yet falling at the first hurdle, again, and again, and again.

I just want the chance, thats all.


Foreigner by Default said...

Oh dear, there is nothing I can say to make you feel better. All I can offer is a virtual hug and a firm assurance that one day sooner or later you are going to make an absolutely smashing dad!

Martin said...

Much appreciated.

♥.Trish.♥ Drumboys said...

I am sorry too is heartbreaking. I have been there many a year.
My only advice is that don't wait to see a fertility specialist if it has been more than 12 months or 6 months if you are or both over 35.

We waited too long but we were blessed.Thinking of you.

Veronica Foale said...

Ugh, I know where you are at right now. This whole trying thing sucks balls.

Hopefully next month for us both.

(((hugs))) to your wife and you if you want them.

Anonymous said...

I feel for you man. I'm one of many dads out here in your neck of blogville rooting for you. At least this month's almost over.

Martin said...

Thanks guys, the comments and wishes are very much appreciated.

Anyway, I'm over it AGAIN, so onwards and upwards.

I can't stand moping about stuff, theraputic mind, but annoying and
I like annoying people, just not myself.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry. I was really hoping that it would be good news for you guys this month.

You know our story. It did take a while.
I have to agree with Babyamore. Don't wait. Start investigating now...and stay away from well meaning people who tell you to just relax and take a holiday.

Martin said...

thanks tiff, indeed I know your story, ...mental note add tissues to shopping list.

Although you make me panic a bit when you say don't wait in such strong terms, I'm recently 30 and ET (the wife) is almost 30.

...and heres me rabbiting on about iPods all day.... 8-0

Joeprah said...

Napster, if it makes any difference at all...I also am getting impatient for you to be a dad because you are awesome and will be a great one. That being said, chin up and stay loose because this will all be a memory to a happy father one day soon.

Martin said...

Admit it, you're just sick of me whinging...


Cheers Joe, nice to hear!