Wednesday 18 February 2009

Going home

I haven't been back to Ireland since 2007.

I'm not sure how much that has, or has not got to do with all this trying to conceive stuff, probably more than I imagine.

There is the practical side of it where we have to be in the same place for two weeks in every four for sure, plus arranging and waiting on appointments with doctors. This makes any longer term plans difficult.

Either way, more than a full year has passed, and I still dread the thought of going home today.

I guess it's the idea of facing people with this hanging over our heads. A little too real.

Last Summer I wrote this joking about the fallout if any of my younger nieces or nephews made any pregnancy announcements. Just weeks later irony bit down hard.

This Friday night we go home to say hello for the first time to ET's new nephew and godson. No doubt there will be some mixed emotions for ourselves, but we are very happy for her brother, a first time dad, and the whole family.

I know from my own family the excitement that surrounds the arrival of the first grandchild.

So we will have a weekend full of chatter and excitement, and reminding ourselves that we don't want someone else's family, just our own.

Sunday, we return to Holland, to start the count down of the last few days of the two week wait.


Speaking of excitement and Ireland, sandwiched in between our arrival and departure, on Saturday night the Irish blog awards will take place in Cork. My anal bleaching, offers of sexual favours, and vaguely veiled threats of violence seem to have paid off, as Xbox4NappyRash is among the 5 finalists in the 'Specialist blog' category.

Yes, I'm clearly an expert at this conceiving business.

One of the first Irish blogs I ever read was Irish Taxi and it, along with last years winner in this category The Family Voyage, plus Irish Economy, and The Biopsy Report are the fellow nominees in the group.

It's a crazy category, very wide ranging, so the outcome is anyone's guess.

On the evening itself I will be holed up in some pub further down the country with my father pouring buckets of beer down my neck, so I think I'll employ Jo from Infantasia (& The Blog Pound & 1 Blank Page) to hurl drunken abuse at the winner on my behalf. I'll be forwarding her a prepared statement of profanity ridden insults for each individual nominee shortly.

Good luck everyone, and enjoy the night.


Anonymous said...

No matter what, try to have a great trip and enjoy the family :)

Ms. Moon said...

I think you're going to win. The universe loves such funny stuff.
Travel safely.

Anonymous said...

I can remember how difficult it was to see our friend's brand new baby in the hospital only a few short weeks after my miscarriage. Mixed emotions indeed. I wish you well.

And how can the internet NOT love you? If there is some justice and brains in the Irish lands, then you will win. Otherwise get piss drunk and start a fight. Go with that.

Kim said...

Oh God, I hear you. We are Americans, yes, but my family is Italian Roman Catholic, his is Irish Catholic. At any family gathering I always feel like the extended members look at us like we are running a centuries old family owned and operated business into the ground. Does that make sense? It is little difficult but in the end I am always happ I went. Enjoy meeting your new nephew and good luck with the awards!

Anonymous said...

Good Luck

Good Luck

Good Luck

That's the 'Luck of the Irish' for yer.

and have a good weekend.

Lea said...

Good luck on both the trip home and the blog award!

Anonymous said...

Hi! Xbox

Thanks for your visit. I have to confess, I've been an occasional lurker here for some time so I know the story.

I understand your mixed emotions re going home this weekend. I had a lot of difficulties in my endeavours to have a second baby (1st one, no problem). It ended up that my sister-in-law and I got pregnant at the same time but sadly I lost my baby half way through the pregnancy. I dreaded her baby's arrival but it wasn't a problem when the time came as they handled the situation sensitively and even named her after me :)

That baby will be 21 next month and has a cousin, my lovely daughter, who's 19 today! We waited 7 long years to have her but by God, she was worth all the heartache. Never give up hope, good will always out.

Congrats on becoming an IBA finalist, it's very well-deserved! Good luck on the night and fingers crossed your own weekend home goes well.

Anonymous said...

Congrats on making the finals and wishing you a peaceful trip home :o)

Anonymous said...

Agh, difficult. I hope that you guys can enjoy the trip somewhat.
And good for you, blogging finalist! Good luck!

Tara R. said...

Congrats on the finals, you're number one to us! Hope you and yours have a lovely visit.

Ian Newbold said...

Enjoy the craic, and I hope you pick up the award.

Karen MEG said...

Xbox, have a great trip home, I hope you have a lovely visit. I can understand your dread, but at the same time it will be so exciting to see and hold your new nephew. And just know that your turn will come, it will.

I remember when my sister told me she was TTC (turns out she was at the same time that we were for #2, and never shared) but said something only AFTER I finally got pregnant again - I felt awful for her! But she told me that her happiness for me made it impossible for her to be bitter about her own situation.

Congrats on being a finalist in the blog awards... so very well deserved. I bet you'll win.

James (SeattleDad) said...

If the anal bleaching doesn't get you the win, then it was rigged from the start. Good luck.

G said...

Congrats on making the finals!!! That's so awesome :) And try to have some fun in Ireland xx

River said...

You're going to win for sure, possibly in the baby stakes as well..........

Korie said...

Enjoy the time with your family. Also, I know it's probably hard for you guys to see happy couples with new babies, but keep in mind (I know this from something that's happening right now with two couples my fiance is friends with) that it's very hrutful to the new parents if you avoid them and their child. I doubt that you would do that but I just wanted to throw it out there.

nh said...

Enjoy the beer!

Congrats on making the final 5.

Good luck on the rest of it...have some fun!

Jane G said...

Enjoy the trip home (what about those pints we were supposed to have?!).

Best of luck for the awards. One of my bros is a finalist too, in the sports category.

Martin said...

@The Social Frog - i'm aiming for damage limitation!

@Ms. Moon - Thanks. - Hard alright.

@Kim - Yes I know that when it's over I'll be glad I went.

@Tismee2 - Thanks.

@Lea - Cheers.

@steph - 7 years! good lord, I know for certain that I couldnt keep it together for that long.
I'm struggling as it is!

tough category alright, but as it's 'specialist' it's interesting to see how dedicated people are to certain topics.

Best of luck.

@Penelope - Thanks.

@Amy - I'm sure we will in the end.

@Tara R. - Thanks a million.

@Single Parent Dad - well done on the craic spelling! impressive.

@Karen MEG - I don't know, I'm in two minds about how reassuring it will be, but we'll see.

@James - Cheers

@G - Will give it a shot.

@River - I know what I'd prefer.

@Lilacspecs - I know, which is why we are going.

@nh - Will try.

@Jane G - This is a serious whirlwind visit, late friday to sunday afternoon.
I saw that mayogaablog made the final list too, well done to him.
Surely that should be in the humour category though?

Anonymous said...

Hugs and good luck.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you're going home. I think seeing the family and meeting the new kid will go fine. Get it over with.
Good luck on the award! You deserve it.

Anonymous said...

good luck on award's night!! knock 'em up... i mean, dead. And up dammit!

brace yourselves for the awful questions that abound at family newborn-snuggling reunions: "So when are you guys going to have one?"

It is a MANDATORY question at these gatherings and intensely evil. It helps just a tiny bit if you and ET have a snarky or sincere comeback ready (or you can just kick 'em in the nuts).

Jane G said...

I'll forgive you this time ;o)

Sharon McDaid said...

I so hope you enjoy your trip back, even though it'll be a bitter sweet experience in many ways. Like an earlier commenter said, have a killer response for the older friend of the family who asks the insensitive question. That stuff bugs the hell out of me, like when my single friends are asked why they don't have a boyfriend yet by nosey folk.

And to be honest, I don't want you to win the award, but I'll be magnanimous in defeat. After all, you bleached your arse and all!

Craig D said...

But... but...

St. Patrick's Day isn't until next month!

Putz said...

just like macauley went home to potato rich [everything else poor] ireland, so goes nappy...kiss the blarney once again, oh no i take that back, you have enough horseshit right now to get along quite well, but eat a potato or two for me won't you???

Not Afraid to Use It said...

Have a great trip, and we want pics of the swank award in your hand.

B said...

that's your nephew in law?

Anonymous said...

Have a great trip and best of luck at the awards!!

Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] said...

Do you have to show them the proof of anal bleaching to win the award? If so, and you win, we know what you did to get it.

Nick McGivney said...

Comment title like that makes me feel like I'm trapped in an old ESB ad or something. Well, you're playing the game of life to win, and I've no doubt that it will be so, whether you are the best specialist blog on the night or not. I'm sure Jo, Sharon and myself will certainly be raising a glass to it. Sorry I'll miss you, sorry I haven't been around more often because you are a witty fucker and always a positive charge in an unlikely universe. Sure you might drop in yet...

Anonymous said...

Meh, stuff the visit home. Come and visit us instead - we'll farm the sprogs off on someone (a long way away) and go and get pissed - we can celebrate your upcoming blog award.

I Am Emily... said...

I fell pregnant 3 weeks after my partners sister miscarried and then his cousin miscarried the week after we made our announcement. I felt like crap, especially since I had been slightly jealous of both of them because I wanted a baby so badly.

Congrats, hope you get the award!!! A nice badge anyway!

Your blog is so well written, sympathetic, humorous, honest.

A Free Man said...

Enjoy Eire and good luck with the award!

Hilary (Maya Papaya) said...

Good luck with that award! You are an awesome writer and sincerely deserve to win.

Martin said...

@tiff - Cheers.

@Angel - Yes, it wont be as bad as I imagine I'm sure.

@geeksinrome - Oh i'm ready for the questions alright!

@Jane G - 3 Hail marys?

@Sharon - Ah Sharon! give a man a break, your mantelpiece is full already!

@Craig D - all year round!

@Putz - How wonderfully insulting. mad bastard!

@Not Afraid to Use It - whatever happens, it'll never get into my hands actually!

@B - see! the debate rages on.

@Deno - Cheers! how are you managing?

@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] - up close.

@Nick McGivney - I am disappointed that I'd have the chance to meet a few of the people I've been reading now for a while and can't take it.
Yourself included sir. Maybe next year...

"a positive charge in an unlikely universe" - I'm using that for the movie tagline.

@bsouth - Uk is two weeks away ;-)

@Tanya - thank you

@A Free Man - Cheers!

@Hilary (Maya Papaya) - Thanks, I appreciate that.

Anonymous said...

Can I collect your award and pretend to be you?

They'll look at me and say "Jaysus, all that compulsory shagging really ages you, doesn't it".

I'll be cheering for you.

V said...

The top 5 ?!! Wonderful!! I hope you win! Keeping my fingers crossed for you for good luck!

Liz said...

Oh! It is tonight. Best of luck.

Lorna said...

Best of luck in the blog awards

IrishNYC said...

Have a wonderful trip, and enough fun to make me jealous.

B said...

Lost cos of current affairs!

Got an Irish Times reference though

Jane G said...

You got a mention in yesterday's Irish Times:

*We are not worthy*
*We are not worthy*

Anonymous said...

SECOND FECKIN' PLACE in the Irish Times article, too!!!

You knocked the Spencer out of Grandad, that's fo sure ;)

Anonymous said...

I was sitting beside Jo and got to read your potential acceptance speech. She would've nailed it. may sleep with their eyes open tonight.

Anonymous said... - who do they think they are? Pah to they specialism. Boring and dry they are. The judges are obviously stupid as well. Hmpf.

Looking forward to 2 weeks time then!

Martin said...

@Tinman - you could nick it off the winner for me?

@Kathryn - Thanks.

@Womb 4 Improvement - hindsight!

@Lorna - Thanks Lorna.

@Irish NYC - Fun is relative!

@B - Isn't that fucking mental? the IT I mean.

@Jane G - How INSANE is that? I nearly choked.

@K8 - I never thought of the order being significant, but it works for me!
It's nuts, really really nuts.
I've often wondered what granddad's take on all this is actually.
If it's any comfort for him, I bought his book today at Cork airport. Don't tell him though.

I'm absolutely going next year, sounds like a real blast.

(oh yeah, make me look like a saddo...)

@bsouth - ah no, it's a bloody good blog. And hugely relevant. The category was very wide ranging.

2 weeks indeed!

B said...

not mental entirely deserved, shane hegarty got me my first few readers too so he knows what he's talking bout ;)

Jenni said...

congratulations on your new nephew, although I know the meeting must have been bittersweet. although I'm guessing more sweet.

Martin said...

@B - Not in question then!

@Jenni - He is a very handsome wee man. Quiet and content.