Baby Juice Update: There is no update, the results were not in. Just as well seeing as ET left the country this morning without her phone and I would have had to have used smoke signals to give her the news, but there isn't any. I'll try again tomorrow, if I haven't spontaneously combusted or been arrested for throwing stones at passing cyclists in the meantime.
Free Stuff Update: I've decided, thanks to Monique's* powers of perception, that I DON'T want a free XBOX360 from Sony to blog about in a witty yet boyishly charming manner, because they don't bloody make them. Instead I think I could do Microsoft a great service by telling the word how their products make me no longer want to change nappies.**
Meanwhile, back on the ranch. Being the wonderful, generous, loving itchy gonad that I am, I've decided to offer my literary services to you all.
Due to the facts that A) I very obviously have no children and therefore nothing to do with my time, and B) having to partake in squelchy sessions more often than was ever intended for a man hurtling towards middle age, and therefore can no longer walk properly or interact with society, I have plenty of time on my hands.
I'm offering, for a limited time only (i.e. until I get bored), an Xbox4NappyRash style review of, or interview with you for, your blog.
If you don't want anyone thinking that you've got a really big head, I'll take nominations for blogs from other bloggers and clear the nomination with you before I write anything.
For reviews I'll even provide a summation in the form of a semen analysis. Now who doesn't want that? eh? eh?
You can e-mail me your request or nomination for a review or an interview on the usual e-mail address I leave when I spam your blog with asinine comments, or at the new sexy, whiter than white address of Xbox4NappyRash@Gmail.com, or even just leave a comment here if you are brave enough.
I'm not one to play the guilt card, but if no-one responds, I'll be f*&^%%$ gutted.
*Go check out the most beautiful baby photo ever on her blog.
** A big fat lie.