Thursday 18 June 2009

The nuts & seeds of the matter

My child is the size of an apple seed. One whole seventeenth of an inch long.

Within a couple of weeks it will be up to one third of an inch. At that rate of growth, in two months it will be taller than I was in college.

What is more interesting is that in the last week or so, it's heart started beating. ET would say that the fact it possesses one means it's already more evolved than it's father.

I'm not sure how something the size of an apple seed can even have a beating heart, so either it is something they make up to stop us getting bored of it all, or it's the most fascinating feat in all of biological history.

We are now past the 5 week mark and into the sixth. The predominant symptom is face ache from grinning like an idiot and an inability to focus on anything for more than twenty seconds.

That's me anyway.

ET is exhausted. Utterly. Totally. Her body has decided to take to this pregnancy like a squirrel, and is insisting she hibernates through the entire thing. I have to wait at her bus stop to knock on the window to wake her. Otherwise she'll end up in Paris some evening.

I have also set her alarm for February next year, should the contractions not wake her.

Unfortunately, unlike squirrels who hibernate in the wild, my nuts may not last the Winter.


61 comments:

Momma said...

Humor only you could give us! I love all the little details...and maybe if she is lucky like I was she will sleep thru most of the contractions!!!

River said...

It is absolutely the most amazing feat in all of biological history. I'm looking forward to reading your post after the first ultrasound when you hear the baby's heart for the first time.
LOL at setting the alarm for February.

Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo said...

ice those babies. It is gunna be a looooooong winter.

..al said...

Want me to send musical chimes from here...they can do the trick....you don't have to stand out in the winter!

J from Ireland said...

You are hilarious! Very entertaining, thanks for sharing. I don't know you from adam but I am really delighted for you both and look forward to sharing this journey.
Week 6, for me, is when the fun begins, all day sickness, exhaustion, everything smelling horrible etc. I really hope ET bypasses all that tough.
Slainte.

Veronica said...

Awesome. Now, all she needs to do is vomit on your shoes and all will be right with the world.

Making Babies said...

Ah you are so cute! :)

frog ponds rock... said...

I do love you... thanks for the smile xox

Ms. Moon said...

"my nuts may not last the Winter."
I doubt they'll have to. ET will not actually sleep through the next seven and a half months.
But that was a very good one. A very, very good one.

Anonymous said...

Still laughing at Veronica's comment.

I hope she does sleep through some, if not most, of the contractions. Much easier that way.

Anonymous said...

Oh God, I remember the Tired. Even now, John will turn the TV channel over because, apparently, he's seen it before - and I erupt in indignation and dispute: we've never watched it! And then I remember the 3 entire months during which I went to bed at 6.30pm, leaving him to enjoy an entire TV season on his tod. Get yourself a nice big box set of something ET hates!

AnnD said...

I never understood how such a little living creature could make a person so tired but they do!!!! I was more tired with Emma than I was with this pregnancy but I've still had my days (yesterday included) that I got a full nights sleep and was ready to go back to bed at 10:30 a.m. Soooo not like me!

I think nausea started for me around Week 7....so you still might have that to contend with!

I love that you are writing about pregnancy symptoms!!!!!!!

darcie said...

The good news about those pregnancy symptoms ie: being sooo tired...is that A) it is a not-so-subtle reminder that things are progressing nicely B)it only lasts for a very short time & C) it is soooo freakin' worth it!

I too am grinning ear to ear - still so damn happy for you both!!

Liz said...

'splain this.

YOur IUI was 26 May (or there abouts not that I am ... ahem ... stalking), which I make to be approx 3.5 weeks ago. I'm assuming therefore that these dates (past five week mark) count from first day of lst period. Right? Or have I got the wrong end of the stick, as it were.

Breigh said...

hahahaha The end made me burst out laughing. I wonder do Squirrels masturbate :P

Rachel said...

You may be surprised in another couple months, ET may actually wear your nuts out! Once that 2nd trimester hits, things just might make a dramatic turnaround;)

WhatAboutNovember said...

chuckle chuckle chuckle

Anonymous said...

Hurray for science!!!
PhD in Biology

Crysbena said...

Oh what an exciting time for you both!!

Russ said...

Your nuts won't have to go on ice for that long. The second trimester was good to me...

Kori said...

Bah, nobody ever died from blue balls.

Anonymous said...

you are so going to miss doing the naughty every 48 hours, aren't you???

that's one of the "joys" of IF... trying for so many years non-stop you kind of are making up for the lack of marital activity that no longer occurs once belly and babies get in the way.(So if you add up how many times you've done it the past year, and divide by 12 it still looks average)

Yo said...

congrats congrats congrats!!!

V said...

Your blog just gets better and better. I can tell, pregnancy tales told by you are going to be great. Keep it coming!
Do you two plan on finding out if it's a girl or boy before the birth?

Sadia said...

The best thing about a twin pregnancy is that we got an ultrasound every single visit - they could only distinguish the heartbeats visually.

Oh the exhaustion! I thought the trimester thing was just a medical convenience, but incredibly, the exhaustion magically disappears at week 13. The first trimester, though, I commuted, worked, commuted and slept. 12 hours of sleep, every night. Do older children (without totally awesome Dads) just fend for themselves for 12 weeks when Momma's pregnant with number 2?

I believe my husband force fed me in my sleep, because how else did I gain 30 pounds?

Claire said...

Can't tell you how good it feels to read this post, I feel like a proud parent watching you discover the many marvels of pregnancy. It is a complete and utter mind boggling miracle, and your awe just keeps on mutiplying along with those precious little cells. Savour every second - tiredness and all!

Martin said...

@Momma - That would be a bit hopeful :-)

@River - Mid February at that!

@Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo - Ice them? by keeping them near your heart...

@WiseGuy - Chimes may well be the most irritating thing on the planet

@J from Ireland - She's going to smell horrible?

@Veronica - Oh great, no puking, now I'll obsess on that

@Making Babies - It's the hair...

@frog ponds rock... - Mind yourself yeah?

@Ms. Moon - Wanna bet?

@bsouth - Don't encourage her,

@hairyfarmerfamily - heh, already started!

@AnnD - That's all I got!

@darcie - yeah, I joke, but I love the fact she's knackered.

@womb for improvement - yeah the 40 weeks count begin on the first day of your last period.
So 5 weeks and 5 days pregnant but was only pregnant for 3 weeks 5 days of that....

@Breigh - :-)

@Rachel - if there is a God.

@WhatAboutNovember - ;-)

@Anonymous - hahahaha

@Crysbena - absolutely!

@Russ - you dawg

@Kori - how many divorces are you on now?

@geeksinrome - In short, Yes.

@Yo is Me - Thanks!

@Kathryn - Yes, absolutely.

@Sadia - hahahaha, shovelling potato into you in your sleep.

@Claire - Nice, thanks.

Deb said...

Tell her to enjoy those naps. Because the first trimester snoozes are the BEST sleep she will ever have again for the rest of her life. Truly. Some of my best pre-kid memories.

Anonymous said...

I thought you were funny before but I think that the next 34 weeks are going to be bloody hilarious!

Jeanette said...

Awwww, love it!!

Jenni said...

Growing a baby is hard work.

Don't worry, the second trimester will be a huge relief, for more than one reason.

Sheila said...

How cool is it to be able to start a post with "My child..."?!

Lorna said...

I remember doing a preg test when i was 6 weeks preg - twas a Monday and on the Thurs I was in hosp on a drip as I couldn't stop being sick but what was wonderful was that on the Friday, they did the scan and at 6.5 weeks, the heart was beating so strongly - I remember looking and just knowing I was going to have a really strong little girl - and she is!
I remember being so unprepared for the tiredness and doing my best to fight it but there's no point - very tiring making eyebrows etc!!
Delighted to hear all going well.

Nick McGivney said...

Dude, I just registered. Sweet, sweet, sweet. Fantastic. Blown over. I'm bringing my A Game of good karma out just for you all. Love it. My hero(es) :)

hotmamamia said...

Best thing ET can do is just follow her own instinct and don't listen to what anyone says...every pregnancy is different...yep, she need naps for sure but that's a good thing; I never had any nausea with 3 pregnancies so it may not happen at all; wait for the cravings (and Spencer's buddies may very well be one of them); this is gonna be a great ride for the next 8 months!

Anonymous said...

Many belated congratulations! I have stalked your blog via a friends for a while, its great to hear your good news :0)

Fingers and toes crossed for you all :0)

Tara R. said...

'face ache from grinning like an idiot...'

Now, that made me go all teary!

PatMan said...

I checked in to see how you guys are doing & am trying not to ware the house after reading all this....

All I can say is 'ah sweet memories! soon will be yours'

Amanda said...

I got the tiredness with pregnancy #3 (child #2). I can remember begging my 2 yo (#1)to have a sleep so that I could rest.

C said...

Oh the first three months are a pain...but honestly it really didnt get much better for me in the second trimester...just telling... ;-)

lynseyj said...

Haha! Nice post Xbox!

Glad to hear you guys are still grinning like idiots -and so you should be, you deserve every minute of it.

Just realised we have the same due date - 14th Feb, spooky eh? Although my daughter was 10 days late so i wont pay too much attention to that!!

ooh, the tiredness, yep I'm with ET on that one. Never had it first time round but wow, it hits you like a sledge hammer. Honestly, just the thought of having to get dressed and take little one to pre school was enough to make me cry yesterday. Blimey, it's all good fun isn't it!!

Take it easy you two and keep the fab posts coming!!

Feebee said...

So ET is nearly 6 weeks? You must be having a scan any day now......????

Kono said...

Congrats mate, i've been lurking about your site from reading other sites and i'm truly happy for you, there's nothing better than kids to make you realize how great life was before you had them, lol, just kidding mate, you're in for the wild ride, boy #2 was born June 4th so i'm a bit tired and wired on coffee and rambling cuz it's hard to make coherent thoughts when you sleep a few hours a day, it's the best tired you'll ever feel though at times you'll want to cry, skip town, check into a mental hospital etal... congrats nonetheless.

Sue said...

Whoo!!

Here's hoping exhaustion is the primary symptom, and not nausea.

Here's hoping for 35 weeks of boring pregnancy!

April said...

Just an FYI, I gave you a shout-out today in my post.

Amy said...

A small tip - in order to give your nuts the best chance, get used to doing some housework. ;)

Anonymous said...

Aww God love her, she's wrecked eh? all good healthy signs that her body has been taken over by the little one. I was pregnant last year at exactly the same time, wondering if your due date is around the same time as mine was. Cherish every moment, I spent 9 months of mine scared shitless LOL!
Deno

Martin said...

@Deb - hahaha

@Penelope - We'll see who's laughing soon!

@Jeanette - :-)

@Jenni - On my knees...

@Sheila - VERY.

@Lorna - I think shes getting used to it now, the idea of being tired and resting as opposed to being knocked out by it.

@Nick McGivney - Was wondering when you'd pop by ;-)

@hotmamamia - that's kind of gross

@unfitbikerchick - Thanks!

@Tara R. - hehe

@PatMan - I hope you mean 'wake'! ;-)

@Amanda - I'm sure that worked a treat!

@Chhandita - how reassuring!

@lynseyj - cool, same date!

@Feebee - 6 weeks Sunday, scan a fortnight from today.

@Kono - :-) behave.

@Sue - I'm secretly hoping for some nausea.

@April - Thank you

@Amy - careful now...

@Deno - mid Feb!

FreedomFirst said...

Congratulations! April told me. I hope all goes well.

Mick said...

I know what you mean about the nuts not lasting to winter :-) although in my case, until summer...

I can tell you're loving this time, and God knows you've earned it. Enjoy it, as I am. It'll fly in and in a matter of months we'll both be here complaining (or not ;-) ) about the sleepless nights.

Karen MEG said...

Loving this, can just picture you grinning from ear to ear...it is spectacular following the development from the apple seed stage. You're gonna flip when your baby's a peanut!

I remember being freakin' tired all the time... a good sign, the baby's already sapping the energy out of her parents. I'd say things are progressing very, very well...

(I won't comment on the nut thing as I haven't had enough to drink yet, my friend...)

Alyssa said...

Tell ET it really will get better - the tiredness. Sometime around week 13 she will wake up and be a COMPLETELY different person!

I Am Emily... said...

My baby gained the nickname Peanut because thats how big she was when we told everyone the news! It is amazing that all of the body parts are present at such an early stage. I couldn't get over the 12 week ultrasound, such a tiny baby with all their fingers and toes already.

From a woman's point of view it is amazing to give birth to a live being who can cry and sleep and feed and poo as soon as they come out of the womb!

Jo said...

Ah, don't worry. After three months the sleeping gets better.

At around four months the other hormones kick in and your nuts will know all about it.

Dondi Tiples said...

Have you seen the trans-v ultrasound already? Sweet little wee thing would look like a baby prawn with a pulsating heart. I cried when I saw Woog's.
Can't wait to see you guys through this as you go through each stage.
Also, your nuts had better wait. Until at least after the first trimester. This is too soon for you to start spitting spencers at the little one. Sheez.

Unknown said...

Oh wow - am so pleased to read this! Congratulations :-)

Petite G. said...

Happy Father's Day!

Martin said...

@FreedomFirst - Thank you.

@Mick - I am, every single second.

@Karen MEG - hahaha, sup up...

@Alyssa - hopefully!

@Tanya - and all at once!

@jothemama - Praying.

@Dondi Tiples - I'm behaving!

@Miranda - thank you

@Petite G. - heh, cheers.

Jenn said...

I hate to break it to you X ... ET is going to be tired for the next 18 years.

Congrats once more.

Maura said...

Yeah. The fatigue is truly distinctive. I was so bewildered by the intensity of it when I was pregnant with my daughter, that when it was the first symptom I had with my son, I knew. I knew without taking a test. I could never figure out how such a microscopic little bugger could kick my ass like that until I read one day that the placenta is complete at the end of the first trimester. So, that explains it. ET is growing a new organ, and will be done with it in like six weeks. Nice.

Give the poor girl a brownie or something.

Martin said...

@Jenn - hehe...

@Maura - A new organ, nice....